Opinion: Rihanna’s Abuse Pain Could Help End The Silence

The news is breaking about Rihanna and Chris Brown’s stormy relationship. Could Rihanna’s public pain help other women survive abuse? It’s time to take the silence out of abuse and bring the light in.

As more comes to light about Chris Brown’s violent nature the world is getting a peek into a glass house of abuse. There are various reports on why Chris Brown and Rihanna fought. Let’s be clear here, it does not matter the why, what matters is the how. Brown allegedly physically harmed the singer. His fists became weapons.

That my friends is abuse.

When one person harms another it is abuse and abuse is illegal.

Are we clear on that?

Because of Brown’s money incidents in the past may have been swept under the table. He was able to pay for broken dishes and hush up staff at one hotel for sure. The Shore Club hotel is now telling of an incident with Brown’s mother that took place in 2007.

Chris Brown is unlikely to see any major time because of the attack on Rihanna this past weekend. Still if charged with felony domestic battery the charge is a serious one. Because of the high profile of this case unless it can stick the D.A. may not prosecute according to TMZ. A more serious charge would be criminal threat. It has been said that Brown told Rihanna that he was going to kill her.

Other news is stating that Rihanna’s friends knew something was up. The young singer had bruises on her neck in December. This makes sense if Brown is an abuser. Most of the time the first attack isn’t one that is in the public view. Another common thread in abuse cases is when friends rally around the abuser saying that it’s not the way a person really is.

The New York Daily News quotes an unnamed friend of Brown’s:

“You can tell everybody that Chris really feels bad about the whole situation, about it coming out the way that it happened, the way he went about it, the way she went about it,” another friend told People. “It’s just a wack situation.”

Abusers are generally seen to the outside world as charming. They are. If an abuser was always a pig no one would get close enough to be hit or threatened or emotionally scarred. Which unfortunately means before the bruises appear no one will take a victim as seriously. Why should they, that nice guy or gal could never do the kind of things their partner is not confiding in you about.

Domestic abuse does not come with a closed caption screen. It’s secret, silent and deadly.

The fights may be loud but the flowers and remorse is gentle.

Let’s hope that Rihanna is not silent. Let us hope that her pain is not in vain. If a young superstar can speak out maybe a young woman will follow that lead.

It’s time to remove the closet when it comes to abuse. Silence kills


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